This post is from Alan.
Sailing Terminology
Avast Ye: “I say there good sailing person, could I have your attention please?”
Bow: Pointy front end of boat
Forward: Toward the bow
Stern: Flat back end of boat; or serious demeanor not often seen afloat
Aft: Toward the stern
Abaft: Behind
Port: Left hand side of boat facing bow
Starboard: Right hand side of boat facing bow
Marine Head: ##**##! electric boat toilet that always breaks down at the most embarrassing moment
Captain: Liza or Alan
Commodore: Liza when she’s not captain
Man Overboard: Non-gender terminology left over from pre-deodorant, non-bathing manly days of sailing when women refused to go to sea until the men smelled better.